Mommy Blogging In Real Life (IRL)

I went to a cool event tonight at the Women's Bookstore. It was to celebrate a book called Mothering and Blogging: The Radical Act of the Mommy Blog. (So I mean, how could I not go?) Also it features works by the fabulous Jen Lawrence, the brilliant Ann Douglas and the notorious Catherine Connors (had to give her a bit of a "bad" sounding intro).

I haven't read the book yet, but I bought it. Not quite the beach read I had in mind for our Florida trip next week (first beach vacation since our honeymoon 10 years ago -- there better be sun Universe!), but from what I heard read aloud tonight I'm quite certain I'll enjoy it.

Let me just put forth what I love about mommy blogging, because I realize sometimes it may seem that I'm a mommy blogger who hates mommy bloggers. (Not true -- though a certain segment bug the shit out of me.)

Since my children were born, some of the coolest events I've attended have been, in essence, an excuse to go out with mommy bloggers. Maybe that's because I'm reading liberal, feminist mommies and feel like my IRL friends just wouldn't get my desire to go to these kinds of cultural events instead of watching The City. (They wouldn't.)

Maybe it's because my IRL friends don't blog, and therefore, have no idea what it means or what it feels like to sincerely care about strangers and think of them as friends. Let's face it, not that long ago this meant meeting up with someone from a chat room or message board, who may or may not have turned out to be the person you thought. There's still a stigma to meeting people online and taking it to IRL.

But then a funny thing happened on my way through the blogosphere -- mamasphere -- whatever you want to call it. I met friends online that I actually REALLY enjoy IRL. In fact, some of my best friends IRL are people I met through this forum (who hilariously -- and sadly -- no longer blog).

I have always been the square peg. I have always had ideas and dreams that fell outside the sphere of the average Armenian girl growing up in Scarborough. In Scarborough you were supposed to grow up, do some sort of post-secondary education that got you the sort of job that made you attractive to men so you could marry into your race, have babies, the house in the suburbs, two cars, etc. You were supposed to love Must-See TV and go to mainstream movies, listen to Top 40 hits and dress like everybody else.

To be radical woman often meant going outside your social circle. And as the daughter of strict Middle Easterns, this was hard. I was expected to hang out with people who were "like us", who had the same curfew rules and the same expectations for their girls. Italians, Greeks, etc. Basically people who had different rules for their daughters than their sons. I rebelled some, but eventually I conformed a bit to make my life easier. Some of those friendships stuck.

Some days it seems really weird to me that I have this life online. My childhood best friend, my sister and my husband all know about this site but don't read it. The girls don't think this is the true me (which I find odd). Admittedly Scarbie Doll is a persona, but I get to be SO HONEST here that I wonder if it's just that they don't want to see this side of me.

My husband just thinks you all know which way his penis bends. He hates walking into a coffee shop or my office and having someone look at him as though they "know" him, when they really shouldn't. (Hence I've stopped writing about his penis.) But his issues about this are... well they need to be considered... but I digress.

Via the Internet I have found a group of women I really and truly identify with. They get me. I can be a super nerd. I can admit that I'm full of shit. We can geek out over tech gadgets and the fact that our third children are our PDAs. We can use nerdy acronyms one second, and discuss pop culture the next. We can laugh at ourselves, laugh at each other and it's OK. We understand each other.

When I talk to my best friend there's this weird feeling that she's trying to keep up with me, trying to be a certain kind of mom for me. I don't really get it. I'm not stupid, I suppose on paper I can be sort of intimidating. For someone who is constantly skint, I lead a very fortunate and charmed life (which can come crashing down when interest rates go up, but I doubt I'm the only one skating on that ice). In fact my whole life could come crashing down at any moment. The seemingly dazzling things about me are all superficial. Strip it all away and this is what you get. But IRL, that doesn't seem to get across.

I'm just me. I want you to like me. I want to talk about cool shit with you. I want to make you laugh and giggle my head off with you (but without being mean-spirited if possible). I want it to be OK with you that I am checking Twitter while we watch TV. I want my life to be a constant stream of ideas and discussions, no pressure, just good energy. I don't care what kind of car you drive or what you fed your kid last night. I just want to be real. And the people I've met through Mommy Blogging seem to be the only ones who get that.

Any ideas on why that is? Is it because only in blogland is it OK to have your head so far up your own ass? I'm I a self-absorbed, crappy friend IRL? I dunno. But you complete me Internets. If loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right.

Winter vacation in Ottawa and the Laurentians with kids

Now is the winter of our discontent...

Yo! Where's the snow? Whether you're on the West coast (or just watching the Olympics and scratching your head), or in another normally snowy province, you might be wondering if you wished winter away with your years of complaining. (Or maybe that's just me.)

With the benefit of having Family Day in Ontario, we decided to make a mini-break of it and head to Ottawa to visit some friends for Winterlude (they HAD to have snow, right?) and then a brief side trip to the Laurentians. Of course at 4PM on our departure date, my husband called to say that Nate had come home from school with a tummy ache, but felt well enough to travel. So off we went.

We packed a cooler of snacks, cleverly put the kids in jammies (and pull-up diapers - just in case) and left after dinner and rush hour. The kids both fell asleep by 7:30 and the two adults took the remaining three hours to remember how to talk to one another.

When we arrived in Ottawa at the home of our friends, it was only a matter of time before Nate got sick all over everything (Murphy's Law). So (contrary to the ruse put on by this photo) our trip started out with a reminder that the best laid plans are often laid to rest (thank goodness we brought the Nintendo DS!).

Winterlude: Rideau Canal Skate

The next day, although on hunger strike, we managed to get Nate off the couch and out the door for a bit. We were under no illusions that he might skate, so we packed our friends' Chariot in their van and headed for our second annual attempt at a Rideau skate.

Taking a good stroller skating is a blessing for people like me who aren't too sure on their blades (as well as for tired, grumpy kids). Lucy didn't last long on her bob skates, but her first attempt at skating made for a fantastic photo op. We made it as far as the first hot chocolate pit stop when Nate started complaining of cold feet. The car was forever away. No one else wanted to leave. But I could see where this was going (Tantrumville).

I could sympathize with the kid. He was sick, far from home and being pushed around on the ice on a freezing Ottawa day, when he'd rather be snuggled up on the couch. We made it to the chalet and rubbed his feet warm and somehow managed to turn his mood around. I drooled longingly over the masses eating Beaver Tails (Ottawa's signature fried dough dessert) but there was no way I could wait in the line without more drama. I skated back to the car making a mental note that next year's Winterlude attempt would be easier (each year gets a bit easier as they get older, right?).

The Laurentians: Chateau St. Adele

We had already planned our Ottawa trip when the Chateau St. Adele in St. Adele, Quebec invited me to come and review their lodgings. By Sunday morning, Nate seemed to be recovering from his bout of stomach flu, and our hosts had a birthday party to attend. So we bid Ottawa adieu and drove 2.5 hours to the Laurentians (bonus points for double naps in the back seat!).

The Laurentians are stunning and a reasonable drive from Ontario (about six hours from Toronto). This is not news to Quebeckers, but for some reason, we don't get a lot of tourism marketing for this geographical splendour in Ontario. After the breathtaking drive, we were greeted graciously by the friendly staff at the Chateau St. Adele.

With super modern and clean rooms, a central location and fabulous indoor and outdoor swimming pools, the Chateau St. Adele was really a treat. We had a one-bedroom family suite ($168 a night, but with frequent promotions, like buy-one, get-one -- it's a steal) with a pull-out couch, big screen TV, real fireplace, two bathrooms, a desk (for Mommy to blog from), plus a little table area, microwave, sink and fridge (for in-room meals and snacks).

Breakfast is included and there are a variety of packages (which can include dinner on the weekends) that offer incredibly affordable rates. The number of nearby snow-activities is mind-boggling and there's great shopping for those who are less winter-inclined.

Of course, Nate didn't want to leave our cosy room (the Olympics were on!), but we're mean parents we had a plan to go explore the hills, so we coaxed him out for our next adventure: tubing!

The Laurentians: Everybody Tube-a-ruba

Getting our eldest, Nate, to do anything that revolves a remote risk is a challenge on even the best day. Getting him to go up a steep hill and then down in something that doesn't have a seat belt, when he hasn't eaten and his stomach is doing flip-flops... well...

A good thing to note if you're headed to the Laurentians, there are two tube hills of note next door to each other. Mont Avila's tube hill requires a trip up a ski lift, so it's pretty adventurous for kids under 7. Next door, Glissades des Pays d'en Haut offers a number of tube slides of varying skill (and bravery) levels. Starting at $78 for a family of four (for 4 hours of amusement), it's not exactly cheap, but way cheaper than skiing, especially when you factor in the fact that you don't need a lot of gear (or coordination for that matter).

We headed for the rafts, thinking that going up and down all together would be more palatable to Nate. Unfortunately, a group of hip American grandmas behind us kept saying how worried they were for us being only four in a raft with not a lot of weight. So there were tears at the top of the hill, but the way down was ridiculously fun. "This is SO MUCH FUN mama!" Nate exclaimed.

Me: "Great! Let's go again."
Nate: "No way, too scary."

So daredevil Lucy went up and down the incredibly well-maintained inner tube slides with me and daddy taking turns and Nate stared out the window of the bunk house. *sigh*

Back to the Chateau St. Adele for a special fireplace dinner and hope that things would go better for our dogsledding trip the next day.

The Laurentians: Dog Sledding

On the Hotel Mont Gabriel property hides the most amazing adventure of a family's lifetime. Dogsledding with the guidance and experience of the fine people at Les Skis Doux was incredible. I had heard some scary things about dogsledding in the past, but the staff at Les Skis Doux are so knowledgeable and organized that it was completely a safe and fun winter experience.

Upon arrival, we parked the car and hopped on a sled. We were pulled up to the dog base via snow mobile ("Whee! This is SO MUCH FUN!" Still, I was 99% certain that Nate was not going to attempt dogsledding, so I warned our hosts in advance.) At the dog base we were greeted by friendly faces and taken back to visit the puppies.

Lucy was in heaven as gorgeous husky puppies licked her face. The dogs were happy and well-cared for and the staff make sure that the entire experience is a safe one.

Then Daddy and Lucy were guided to a sled, harnessed with six beautiful dogs. The guide hopped on the back and off they went for an hour-long expedition through nature, surrounded by snow and mountains. I'm pretty sure it was a father-daughter memory that will stay with both of them forever (Lucy hasn't stopped telling everyone about sledding with the doggies).

What I Learned on My Winter Mini-Break

No two kids are alike. Sometimes in families, this can be tough. One kid is terrifyingly adventurous; the other, annoyingly over-cautious. There are pros and cons to both. But I'm still learning the balancing act of what we can do as a family with these two different people. (Though when I put it that way, it's not so different from marriage.)

Things that saved the trip:

* Packing lots of snacks. Avoiding stopping by passing a granola bar to the back seat saves time, money and aggravation.

* Packing every kind of medicine. From drugstore essentials like basic first aid stuff and pain relievers, to homeopathic and natural remedies, having a variety of tools to turn to was extremely helpful -- if for nothing else than my own sanity.

* Gadgets. When I was a kid, my sis and I would throw paper out the back window of our station wagon. Car seats are a necessary nuissance and gadgets can help break up the boredom of long drives. LEGO Batman on the Nintendo DS for Nate, Ni Hao Kai Lanepisodes on the iPod Touch for Lucy, a bit of a trade in the middle and the BlackBerry for mom (Google Maps and Twitter are my must-haves).

* Capitalizing on nap and sleep times. Car travel at sleepy times means less "Are we there yet?" and more time for mom and dad to connect as a couple (or argue about the accuracy of Google Maps, whatever).

* Gracious and understanding hosts. Everyone from our friends in Ottawa to our innkeepers in Quebec were very accommodating and understanding of our sick kid situation. And you know what? It beat being stuck indoors with a sick kid at home.

We're definitely making this an annual tradition.

Wishful Make-upping

My 13-year-old niece was over after school, hanging out and helping me with my kids. (I am spoiled when it comes to help, I know.) I have known her since she was 2. She is now taller than me and absolutely stunning. When I'm not completely jealous of her genes, I see a burgeoning young woman and I am so proud and honoured to be able to help shape who she is.

I am kind of known as the auntie who is frilly, girly and sometimes honest to the point of being inappropriate. But I love that, because as V grows up and enters the jungle of high school and dating and partying, I feel like I'll be able to help. Like all my shallow pursuits will come in very handy at this one, life-shaping juncture.

So for Christmas, I bought her a make-up case and filled it with make-up. I kept it pretty simple: Rimmel, Lip Smackers, the kinds of products young girls should learn with. (I'm not moving her up to Sephora just yet.)

We were having such a great time that night that I asked her to sleep over. When her mom dropped off her jammies and toothbrush, she also brought the makeup case. "Maybe Nadine could show you how to apply eyeshadow," she suggested. It was as though Gretz passed me the torch to light the aluminum penises at the Opening Ceremonies.

We snuck down to the basement after the kiddos were asleep. After going through the DVD collection to see if she was ready for some of my faves (Breakfast at Tiffany's, The Apartment, Groundhog Day...) we settled on Pretty in Pink.

We watched scenes of high school drama and the socio-economic gap play out to that unbelievable John Hughes soundtrack of New Order, OMD, Nik Kershaw -- songs that shaped my tweens. We laughed at the outfits and how ordinary Andrew McCarthy really was, but how in love with him I was back in the day. We discussed how Molly Ringwald was pretty in a simple way that made her feel like she could be you. We agreed that Duckie makes the whole movie.

At my suggestion, V busted out the three-tier Rimmel eyeshadow, holding it awkwardly. And then, totally deadpan, she uttered, "So much for Women's Lib."

I'm still laughing days later.

Slipping Through My Fingers All The Time

At our weekly kiddie music class (the class I firmly believe absolves me of all my Mommy Guilt) this week, our lovely instructor passed around large rectangular pieces of a shimmery, sheer fabric. We were to mimic the falling of snow by tossing them up in the air. Then we moved onto Peekaboo. I looked at Lucy with her gauzy snow-veil falling over her muffin head, and my eyes filled with tears.

I don't know if my children will grow up and get married. If they listen to their father's repeated cautions of "Keep your eyes on the ground. Do not make eye contact with anyone. Don't talk to anyone or smile at anyone..." then perhaps not. Heck, I don't even know what the WORLD will be like in 20 or 30 years, forget thinking about my kids' future love lives and what conventions they may or may not be into.

But this in this wee glimpse, I saw myself placing that veil on my adult daughter's head and I was filled with inexplicable emotion. I felt silly after -- I didn't dare tell the huzzle (who is convinced he will sway the kids to stay alone forever), but I wanted to note that moment here, because it was pretty and in that millisecond I really felt like a mom.

****************

Today Lucy was down and out. Stomach flu, bile and orange Gatorade soiling my couch (which has already been defiled by spilled sippy cups over the past 5 years). Repeat viewings of The Little Mermaid, umpteen requests for "Snuggle me Mama" to remind me that she's still mine for a while.

I'll take it.

Cooking up a Contest

Most days I try to keep my two lives separate. In this space I am my true self, exposing overly honest and earnest snapshots of my life, peppered with curse words that make me feel comfortable.

At my day job I am sweet. And that's not a lie, I really am -- it's not too far of a stretch. But there has to be a place for the dark thoughts to go. And a place to work out my frustrations. So here we are.

But from time to time I might lead you to my other website, my place of work, because I write well there too and you may enjoy it. I have a contest running on my blog there right now, and if you go over and suggest recipes for me to try out on my family, you'll be automatically entered to win a $150 prize pack (sorry open to Canada only, but unfortunately not Quebec).

So pay SweetMama a visit. It's really a great site, and we're constantly striving to make it better. Plus it's a great place to stretch your writerly legs if you're so inclined. We have a weekly guest blog post and if you're interested in submitting, check out some of the others and follow the link to the submission email at the end.

That's my wee bit of self-promotion. Thanks for indulging me Internets.

The Tale of the Gregarious Girl and the Lily-Livered Lad

Once upon a time, there was a boy... let's call him Cornelius. He was born under strange circumstances, and his mother constantly worried about him as a result. Somehow she passed this worry onto him and now she had no clue how to undo what she had done so that he could live a normal life.

Cornelius worried all the time. He had a perma-thought formed on his face as he weighed everything before attempting any of it. If he perceived a risk, the potential for harm or just the potential to scare the crap out of him, he wouldn't go near it.

In the past, his parents would just shrug and try to cajole him out of his timidness. But then one day, they gave him a sister. We'll call her Farren (it means "adventurous" - just go with it). Farren was born knowing exactly what she wanted from life and spent most of her time figuring out how to get it. What she was constantly seeking was fun. Fun, fun, FUN!

The problem was that Farren's desire to grab life by the horns didn't jive with Cornelius desire to retire to Florida and play Kanasta full-time at the age of five. Oh he loved her, loved to laugh at her antics -- but he loved to do it from the sidelines. Ideally from the safe and comforting spot known as "His Mother's Lap".

His mother tried everything. Herbal remedies, repeat readings of Scaredy Squirrel, talking to him, but it was no use. Cornelius was determined to be stuck in Worryville and the rest of the family would just deal with it.

One weekend, Cornelius and his family went to Ottawa, Canada to experience Winterlude with one of their favourite families. Cornelius worked himself up the whole week and got sick right before leaving for the trip. He spent the trip on the couch, complaining of a tummy ache, and his mum and dad couldn't figure out how much of it was a virus and how much was just in his wee worried head.

They tried to take him skating on the Rideau Canal. While Farren insisted on being pulled along on her bob skates, Cornelius asked to sit in a stroller and cried about his cold feet, making it impossible for anyone to enjoy the skate.

They tried to take him to the local kiddie pool. While Farren donned water wings and leaped after her dad into the deep, Cornelius stuck to the conveniently safe confines of the baby pool. While Farren repeatedly thrust herself down the slide, while she begged her mom to help her to swim, Cornelius hung back like an 80-year-old in a hot tub.

They tried to take him tubing. He made it for one whole ride --

"Whee! That was SO FUN!"

"Yay! I'm so glad. Want to go again?"
"Nope, I'm too scared."

Cornelius then begged his mother to take him to the hut for a hot chocolate and french fries (which he barely touched). They watched Farren and daddy repeatedly go up and down the hills with excitement and glee. But alas, there was no getting Cornelius to participate and make it a family activity.

The next day they went dog-sledding. The snowmobile picked them up from the parking lot and whipped them over hills to the dog base. "Whee! This is SO FUN!" Cornelius exclaimed. His mother was hopeful that he would try out the sledding.

It was not to be. While Farren ran to the puppies and petted them and hugged them, Cornelius stood far back. While Farren and Daddy sat in the sleigh and were pulled by six of the most beautiful dogs on Earth, Cornelius stared at a fly, mysteriously alive, in the window of the bunk house. His mother tried to distract herself by talking to the man who owned the dogs, but she kept taking furtive glances at Cornelius' hollow eyes and lethargic demeanor.

The more worried Cornelius gets, the more out of sorts, the more his mother's worry deepens too. She tries to remind herself that the key to healing his worried brain is in fixing her own mind, but she just can't shake the "worry bugs" as Cornelius calls them. And neither can he. So they sit on the sidelines together... waiting for an answer that may never come.

So you want to start a mommy blog

Originally published on Sweetspot.ca

I recently got an email from a new reader to my personal blog. She said I inspired her to start her own blog (perhaps my favourite compliment of all time), and then asked me for some tips.

 

I was amazed by how quickly I rifled them off. So I thought I should share them with you. Many moms are looking for some mental exercise (especially while on parental leave) and blogging is a fantastic way to add something of value to your resume to cover those gaps in employment. By spending a bit of time on blogs and/or on Facebook and Twitter, you'll gain skills in social media, while keeping Grandma in Cornerbrook up-to-date on your growing family.

 

Tips for Beginner Bloggers:

 

1. Write like no one is reading. In the beginning, this will be easy. Because, hey, no offense, but no one will be reading at first. You need to build and audience, which leads me to...

 

2. Let everyone know about your blog. If it's meant to be private and anonymous, then you'll have to go a different route. But assuming you're posting your thoughts on a variety of PG-AA14 subjects and just practicing your writing chops, then it's safe to post your updates on Facebook, Twitter and/or even send an email letting your contact list know that you're broadcasting your thoughts in an accessible way.

 

3. Let every stranger know about your blog. Whether you want your blog to be anonymous, (and don't delude yourself, it's really hard to do this) or not -- it's crucial to build an audience of strangers. Otherwise you'll just be posting your thoughts to your Mom in Medicine Hat every week. The best ways to build your audience are:

 

3A. Read as many blogs as appeal to you (and are similar to you in interests) and be sure to comment on them regularly. Many popular bloggers are busy. But if they see that you've commented they might click over to sample your flavour. If they like your flavour, they might comment back. They might continue to come back. You might become friends. They might add you to their blogroll and tell all their readers about you. And so on. This exercise (one that this writer is admittedly bad at) is the most cumbersome but important way to build relationships and readership through blogs.

 

3B. Add your favourite blogs to a blogroll. Reciprocal linking is crucial for two reasons: 1) it's free advertising, and 2) the more reciprocal links you have (meaning you link to a blog and they link back to you), the higher your Google ranking and the easier it is for other potential readers to find you.

4. Try to write 3 times a week. If you want to build an audience -- assuming that's your objective -- you'll have to work up to that amount. If your objective is just to play around online and write stuff when the mood hits, then don't worry about this, but don't expect to be a crazy popular blogger either. Set realistic expectations based on the amount of effort you're willing to put in.

 

5. Don't get caught up in the numbers. This goes back to point #1. Once you get caught up in who is reading you, your daily statistics, how many ad dollars are coming in. etc. If you do, then you'll start changing your style and life to attract readers. Be true to yourself. If you write it well, they will come.

 

6. Include more paragraph breaks than you would if you were writing in a Word document. One's eyes get tired faster reading a computer screen. Break up the paragraphs more than seems natural, so that you don't lose readers before you've made your point.

 

7. Include images when you can, but don't steal them. Use your own, or check out Stock Exchange for free photos (though they're not the greatest always), Flickr's Creative Commons licensed pics and iStockPhoto (small fee per photo) are usually best for stock imagery. Check the rules on whatever site you use to make sure you're following protocol and not stealing someone's artwork.

 

8. Practice, practice, practice. The craft of writing improves the more you read and write. Keep doing it. As they say, do what you love and success will come.

So You Think You Can Blog

I recently got an email from someone new to my blog. Which of course makes me sad, because my blog is as fertile as the Tonto desert these days. Anyway, she said I inspired her to start her own blog (perhaps my favourite compliment of all time), and then asked me for some tips.

I was amazed by how quickly I rifled them off so I thought I might as well share them with you, because, well, it's readable! And it might be helpful to others thinking of starting (or, those like me -- who just need a gentle kick in the ass as to what this is all about).

Tips for Beginner Bloggers:

1. Write like no one is reading. In the beginning, this will be easy. Because, hey, no offence, but no one will be reading at first. You need to build an audience, which leads me to...

2. Let everyone know about your blog. If it's meant to be private and anonymous, then you'll have to go a different route. But assuming you're posting your thoughts on a variety of PG-AA14 subjects and just practicing your writing chops, then it's safe to post your updates on Facebook, Twitter and/or even send an email letting your contact list know that you're broadcasting your thoughts in an accessible way.

3. Let every stranger know about your blog. Whether you want your blog to be anonymous, (and don't delude yourself, it's really hard to do this) or not -- it's crucial to build an audience of strangers. Otherwise you'll just be posting your thoughts to your Grandma in Medicine Hat every week. You do this by:

3A. Read as many blogs as appeal to you (and are similar to you in interests) and be sure to comment on them regularly. Many popular bloggers are busy. But if they see that you've commented they might click over to sample your flavour. If they like your flavour, they might comment back. They might continue to come back. You might become friends. They might add you to their blogroll and tell all their readers about you. And so on. This exercise (one I am admittedly bad at) is the most cumbersome but important way to build relationships and readership through blogs.

3B. Add your favourite blogs to a blogroll. You'll see I don't have a blogroll. That's because I'm unconventional and hate the bullshit that comes with mommy blogging. I don't like picking favourites. I like who I like. But I also don't have 10,000 readers. I used to have about half that, but then I got really sporadic in my blog updating, so loads of people went away to see that other shiny thing over there. Which leads me to...

4. Try to write 3 times a week. I can no longer keep that up myself, especially now that I blog for work too. But if you want to build an audience -- assuming that's your objective -- you'll have to work up to that amount. If your objective is just to play around online and write stuff when the mood hits, then don't worry about this, but don't expect to be a crazy popular blogger either. Set realistic expectations based on the amount of effort you're willing to put in.

5. Don't get caught up in the numbers. This goes back to point #1. Once you get caught up in who is reading you, etc, then you start changing your style and life to attract readers. This kind of blogging is done from a place of ego and while I have engaged in that activity in the past, it serves no one well. Be true to yourself. If you write it well, they will come.

6. Include more paragraph breaks than you would if you were writing in a Word doc. One's eyes get tired faster reading a computer screen. Break up the paragraphs more than seems natural so you're not the blog equivalent of James Frey.

7. Include images when you can, but try not to steal them. I have thieved in the past, but don't any longer. I use my own, or Stock Exchange for free photos (not the greatest always), but Flickr's Creative Commons licensed pics are usually best for stock imagery. Check the rules on whatever site you use to make sure you're following protocol and not stealing someone's artwork.

8. Practice, practice, practice. The craft of writing improves the more you read and write. Keep doing it.

Ooh, don't I sound all grown-uppy? Listen up folks. 6 years of blogging has made me able to put Social Media Specialist on my resume. You can too. Write down everything you've learned since you started writing and/or reading blogs, using Facebook and Twitter (why aren't you on Twitter yet? It could make or break your next job interview). You'd be surprised at your knowledge base.

Got more work-, social-media- or editorial-related questions for me to answer? Email me or leave it in the comments below. (BTW, my former commenting tool, Haloscan, is donesky and I've lost 4 years worth of comments. Very sad. But on the plus side, I have Blogger comments now, which you've probably used before and are familiar with. Just take a moment to set yourself up if you're not, just so I know you're still here. Thanks Internets.)

Craft: How to make a love tree for Valentine's Day

My son takes it pretty hard each year when we take the Christmas tree down. This year, amid the sobs of "Bye bye twee!" I came up with the genius idea that we would have a year-round tree. One that we decorate each month according to the holiday, etc. Not trusting myself to keep a potted green thing alive for a whole year, I went to Pier One to scope out their decor branches and walked out with a deeply discounted, post-Christmas metal tree that is perfectly suited to this cause.

Then I forced encouraged everyone to help with our first ever Valentine's Tree. Here's what you'll need to get this going in your house:

1 small potted tree, or metal jewellery stand that looks like a tree or branches in a vase
4-6 pages of construction paper in pink, red, white, black (or in my family's case -- green?)
1 glue stick
2-3 pairs of kid-safe scissors
1 hole punch
Assorted glitter pens or loose glitter
1 rescued from the recycling dish type object for the loose glitter (I reuse Tenderflake aluminum pie shell pans)
Thin red ribbon for affixing hearts onto the tree

Fold paper into the right-sized widths for your "tree" and draw half a heart along the fold (think back to first grade). Let school-age kids take a stab (pardon the pun) at cutting them out. Try desperately to keep the toddler away from the scissors. Get over the fact that their hearts have right angles, because you love your kids. Let them cut out hearts that are too big for your vision of your tree (and also in un-Valentine-sy colours) -- because you love your kids. Let your bemused, slightly smug partner get creative and take a different approach to heart-cutting too. (Note the rectangular ornament.)




Paste different-coloured, different-sized on top of each other. Cover some hearts in glue and dip them in glitter, CAREFULLY shaking off the excess. (Yeah, my dining room looks like Rupaul threw up all over it right now). Ignore the mess Have fun with it! Punch holes in the hearts and hang them on the tree. We didn't need ribbon to hang ours, but you likely will.

Giggle when your toddler rips one off the tree, looks at you with that pout and says, "Heart, bwoken mama." (Pray that it's a million years until you actually have that conversation.) High fives and group hugs -- when you're done sweeping the glitter and paper clippings.