Friday, February 13, 2009

Screw St. Valentine, give me St. Bourbon

So of course, when we came home from Ottawa, I came down with the worst sickness I've had since Lucy was born. I can't remember the last time I was in bed for a week (probably after my c-section with Nate). The worst part was, I had to send Lucy to my mom's because I was not well enough to take care of her.

"I've abandoned my child!" I kept screaming in my head. And no amount of drinking your milkshake was going to cure the guilt.

She came home yesterday and we had a pretty good evening. But when she woke up at 6:30 am this morning, I turned and coughed up a flaming lung. Then I realized that everything in my body hurt. And I thought, "How the fuck am I going to make it through the next 6 hours until J comes home?"

We mostly managed. The house looks as though it's been ransacked by burglars of course. But I was impatient and the simple "share with your sister or the Lego gets put away" conversation turned into a bit of a fight. (Yes, we've given up on trying to keep the Lego out of her hands, we've just had to be extra vigilant about teaching her it doesn't go in her mouth.) But then J showed up and saved the day.

The kids were meant to go to Grandma's anyway, since J is working tomorrow night and I will use any Hallmark occasion available to force him into a date night. ("Honey, it's National Beavers Day! Let's go out.") Except:

1) Lucy had one of those up to the neck poops today. Which NEVER happens to my consto girl. But because I can't smell, I didn't notice. She squirmed away from me while I was changing her and smeared shit all over the sheets. Like serious shit.

2) We only have one set of sheets.

3) I can't stand up for more than 10 minutes at a time, so I won't make much of a date anyway.

4) Because I can't stand up for more than 10 minutes I did not shave my legs during my shower. Nor did I make any attempt to style my hair, pluck my caterpillars, or look in any way sexy after said shower.

5) Can't taste anything, so taking me out to dinner would be pointless.

6) Coughing blood is so not sexy.

So looks like the "in sickness and in health" clause will be up for review again tonight... Here's to ordering in and hoping he still loves me in the morning.

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